*sigh* ok I wanted to save this but it's too cool to wait *shoots RYNO VI at sam* (this is the RYNO VI http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1LuaahKHi34 )

I absorb the blast, and vaporize into nothingness, from what I can tell of the gun. Sister, having finished wrenching Ren's head from his mutilated corpse, catches sight of this and enters a state of berserker rage, flying towards BabyEater with such force they both fly straight through a wall, and BabyEater is crushed to a pulp.

*respawns by my suck cannon that has leveled up into the vortex cannon and sucks up sister*

I respawn in front of BabyEater and kick him in the stomach. I take his Suck Cannon, stick it down his throat to suck all his innards out, then smash it with my golf clubs to release Sister.

I open my eyes.

"What!? I can't take a rest for a few hours without people coming in and out of my Hellish realm as they please?"

I stand up from my throne and open a portal to the mall, my mind set on sending anyone I can find to the deepest circle of Hell.

*pokes ren* hey guess what "what?" this*puts a groovitron ball in your pocket*

"Fool. You cannot touch the devil!"

EMB drops to the floor and starts withering away.

I hear Sir's sister zooming around the mall and go looking for her.

*respawns on the other half of the mall*......fuck *sister yells from inside the gun so I kick it* quiet you!

I burn down a candy store with hellfire, just for the sake of it.

(this is today's obligitary awesome battle theme.)

(...Actually, I've changed my mind. This is.)

"You have no power over me!"

I shoot hellfire at sister and she tries to block it.

"You can't hold forever! You're just a soul!"

walks back in with an omega pyrocinerater with acid mod

"ok 2 v. 2?"

"Right. EMB, you take care of sam."

I finally manage to break through sister's defenses. She falls to the ground, and I take that chance to grab her. I take her and sam to Hell and hold them in a special torture device. The only way they can be freed is by having someone else willingly take their place.

*just watches* aww you didn't lemme kill one first

"Oops, sorry about thet."

I bring sam back from Hell and leave him in EMB's hands.

"Have fun."

you are a good man. when i die and take over i'll only send you to the 2nd lowest level of hell *burns sams legs off then breaks his fingers* torture....what a wonderful art

Thank you, my good sir. But seeing as I am the supreme ruler of Hell, I am the one who gets to send you wherever I want.

Meanwhile, my human self returns to the mall.

"Hmmm... I don't remember being here before."

*poking sam in the eye over and over again* hehe squishy ^^

It appears that I'm in the parking lot. While trying to find an exit to the mall, I hear a noise behind me.

"No, it can't be!"

I'm killed before I can warn the others about the danger that now lurks within the mall.

*hears something outside* hmmm...LAAAAWWWRRREEEENNCE! what was that? "horrible screams of pain sir." oh.ok *poke poke*

While waiting in line to respawn, all I can think of is getting to the mall and warning everyone.

"Please, this is urgent, can't you let me through?", I say.

"Sir, please stay in line."

"But I have to warn everyone in them mall. They're in grave danger."

"Oh, really? Hey, Jimmy! This guy says he's got to warn some peeeeeople about some daaaaaanger."

"Ah, these guys really think they can fool us with these stories.", says Jimmy. "Just shut up and wait for your turn. You're the 3rd guy who tries that this week."

*walking around mall and sees a store* LAAAAWWWRRREEEENNCE whats xxx mean? "pornographic material sir" wha???"naked meatbags sir" i find that racist "sorry master meatbag"

Tired of waiting in line, I kill the two guards, walk up to the respawn gate and walk through. I arrive at the mall, right next to the entrance to the parking lot.

"Good, I can still warn them."

But when I look around, I see that I'm already surrounded. They got me.

_{The zombies...}

"so your telling me that this teleportation spell of yours will take me to Balmora?" Guilt asks a young journeyman of the mages guild.
"Indeed, just as soon as you part with the sweet moon sugar," purrs the doped up Kajit.
"fair enough, here's your back of strange white powder you weirdo," And with that he was off, leaving the contents of his stomach lying on the floor and a strangled curse trailing off for all eternity.
Crunch, went his back as he came crashing down onto a concrete flooring.
"Bugger".

*sees zombies outside the window*LAAAAWWWRRREEEENNCE!"the chainsaw sir?" no i have a better idea...

*bursts through the window with a motorcycle and a glove that shoots CDs at high velocity and kills his way to ren* GET ON!

While I waiting in line to respawn again, I notice that the guards I killed previously are right in front of me.

"Damn, now I'm screwed."

"now I know your zombies, but surely you've got some survival instinct" He says with his back to the wall, the enchanted blade of Frostfire clasped in his hands.
"apparently I still have to work on my speechcraft, fortunatly my skill in longblades is a race perk".
Guilt proceeds to hue off every encroaching necrotic limb and any skulls which present themselves.

*dresses up in michal jackson out fit then throws a groovitron ball making every zombie do the thriller dance*

Taking advantage of this weird turn of events, Guilt makes a break for it.
"For the love of every god and daemon out there, let me in!" he yells while smashing his gauntleted fists against the door.

The guards notice me and kill me. I wake up in a strange room.

*opens the door quickly* c'mon!

"THANK YOU!" Guilt bales through the door and slams it shut behind him.
"You would not believe the day I'm having".

"believe me i've had worse. you ever been killed 3 times in a 10 minute period?"

"that sounds painful, for that matter, how are you talking to me if you died?"

"well in escapitopia you die really fast and hell got boring so I left."